Akhoti Haktana Little Sister
by starlight1228
Summary: "She was the best of us," -Ziva talking about her younger sister, Tali. A Hamas suicide bombing had killed her, and Ziva had been there as well. What did she do after she watched her sister die in the ruins of a shopping mall?
1. If You Can't Hold On

**BEER SHEVA, ISRAEL**

**JUNE OF 2002**

* * *

It was a bright summer day in Beer Sheva and Tali David was going to the shopping mall with her sister Ziva. She'd finally got some time off from Mossad, a miracle given everyone was working overtime, trying to counteract the Second Intifada. Tali had seen what Mossad would do to Ziva, make her isolate herself from anyone who wasn't a Mossad officer themselves, not talking to anyone because it was a 'sign of weakness'. Abba had warned her what the work would be like, he'd offered her a position after she finished her time with the Tzahal, warned her of what could happen with the nearly impossible duty that came with defending her homeland, but Ziva agreed. And now she blamed Abba. Tali had listened to Abba once, why he trained Ziva. He could not tell Ziva of course, she would be at his throat, accusing him of lies and manipulation. But Tali listened to people, took them at their word. He explained how he did not want Ziva to fail, which in the business of Mossad, meant die. Should she ever want to enter such a dangerous field, he wanted her to be the best. Unfortunately, that had cost him his daughter. Part of Tali wanted to hate him for what he did to her big sister, isolating her and showing her such a terrible world there was. But every Israeli knew the grim reality of the world, just look outside your window. Ziva just told Tali that she was helping stop it, but Tali couldn't help but thing if she wasn't destroying herself in the process.

Tali shook her head. She wasn't going to be cranky and in a scolding mood when her sister finally got back home! She'd talked to Ima on the phone a bit while she was at the airport and she said Ziva was very upset about having spent so much time in Egypt, so she wasn't going to make her experience in her hometown miserable! She'd even baked a cake for the occasion!

* * *

Ziva David was thinking of other things as she pulled into the parking lot. How nice it was to take a break from Mossad, even for two days. Everyone was working themselves to the bone to prevent yet another attack on Israel and its citizens, meaning there was a Shin Bet or Mossad officer on every flight to and from Israel, a Shin Bet officer at every border patrol checkpoint to look for suspected terrorists, though now they were training the IDF to identify every know terrorist. Mossad was in every backroom and bar that any terrorist had had any record of entering, even in the womb. Heightened security measures were seen at the standard metal detectors in every school, the armed guards at government buildings, IDF patrols increasing along the new border wall.

Anyone not part of this was chained to their desk, listening to chatter sent in by satellites, bugs, wiretaps, you name it. Unfortunately, after the mandatory week off after an operation, everyone was sent to work until another cover rolled in, sending them to another corner of the world. For Ziva, her mandatory week off ended in two days, meaning visiting Tali and Ima were a must. She'd seen Ima the day before, catching her at the airport as she left for Berlin on a business trip. Now it was Tails turn. Ziva wanted to see Ari badly, but being a mole meant no mandatory breaks for you.

When Ziva stepped onto Israeli soil, she had not bothered to notify her father. He would already know, the _mamzer_. She dropped off her debriefing with Michael, the only real friend she had at Mossad. He was buried in paperwork himself and only managed a slight smile and greeting, informing her he'd been up for three days and couldn't think. Ziva smiled and brought him some coffee.

Ziva stopped her thoughts from wandering to Mossad, she was here to spend time with her sister, Tali. She would be happy today.

* * *

_"The boy will do it?"  
_

_"Yes, I trained him myself."_

_"If he sets it off too early-"_

_"I promise, he will do everything you instructed."  
_

_"The Zionists will get what they deserve."_

* * *

"Tali! You did not!" Ziva exclaimed, her mood having been elevated infinitely by the end of the day. A feat only Tali and her mother could accomplish.

"And then Yosef said, 'well Tali, it appears you should get the solo!'"

"I'm glad you beat this Reuben character, he doesn't even look like he shaves," Ziva giggled, making Tali laugh. They were two of hundreds of people in the mall, it was always busy in the evening.

"I think the audience would think we had a new technology, allowing boys to sing so high," Tali joked. Ziva smiled at her sister, looking at what a beautiful girl, no, woman, she had turned into since she had left to serve in Tzahal and Mossad.

"What?" Tali asked. Ziva smiled and shook her head.

"Nothing," Ziva shrugged it off, only then noticing the _perfect _birthday gift for Tali. It was a simple necklace, a small silver chain and a Star of David charm on it. Tali's birthday was in May, but she had to make up for being out of the country for it. "I have to go get something. You _stay _here," Ziva instructed. She wouldn't lie to her sister, but she wasn't going to let her see her own birthday present!

"Alright. I'll will stay right _here_," Tali mimicked, walking over to a bench to sit down that was about ten yards away, another boy was already sitting there. Ziva felt something in her stomach, something was not right, but she nodded and went into the jewelry store. She was walking out the door, after purchasing the necklace, when she realized what had set off her internal alarm system. The boy was an extremely nervous-looking Palestinian. Normally that would mean nothing to her, but not many Palestinians lived in Beer Sheva. Nor did the wear sweatshirts in the middle of June while they were sweating buckets. Or have a layer of 'fat' underneath it.

"Tali!-" Ziva yelled, wanting her to come away from there, but the boy saw Tali coming over to him, and, thinking he was about to be discovered, reached into his pocket for the detonator. The explosion blinded and deafened Ziva in a split second. It sent her sprawling over the display case, landing on her back and knocking the air out of her lungs. It all went black after that.

* * *

She awoke mere moments later, the whine of sirens in the distance, rushing to where the damage had already been done. In those few fuzzy seconds, Ziva remembered what had happened. Shoving debris off her and ignoring the shrapnel inside of her, she pulled herself up and stumbled over the wreckage, hurrying to find her sister.

"Tali!" she cried out, her voice scratchy and barely audible.

"Tali!" she called again, her voice now much louder but scratchier. She heard a mumble and a shift in the wreckage. Ziva scrambled toward it, giving no heed to her surroundings, stumbling several times. Eventually, she found her way to her dying sister.

It was a miracle her sister was still alive. Ziva could tell from the red pockmarks on her beloved sister, she had been hit on nearly all of her right side, her right lung, right kidney, any internal organ on the right side had been hit, she should have bled out by now. She must have seen the boy too and thrown her arms up to shield herself, thinking of her heart and brain only, shielding those with her arms. The evidence of this was the terrible condition her arms were in.

"Ziva?" her sister murmured, barely audible and her movements cause her great pain, that much showed on her face.

"Tali, Tali, it's me," Ziva said, saying someones name kept them focused. "It's me, don't move, it will cost you dearly," Ziva told her, then cursed herself. Anxiety was the last thing her baby sister needed!

"Ziva," she repeated, as if she was imagining her sister in front of her.

"I am here," Ziva answered, "Tali!" she cried again, her sisters eyes dilating. The focused again and Ziva granted herself the luxury of relaxation.

"Ziva," Tali coughed, "I want you to do something for me-"

"No, Tali!" Ziva protested, knowing she shouldn't prolong her sister like this, but if her sister was thinking this way, Ziva's thoughts would spiral down with her. "Do not you think that way! You will make it out of this! You will live to do what you ask me!" Ziva said fiercely, she was _not _going to see her baby sister, her _akhoti haktana._

"Don't isolate yourself. Not like you do now that you're in Mossad," Tali said, surprising her older sister.

"I don't-" Ziva was about to protest, but cut herself off. She was lying, the problem was she knew it. And it was to her own sister.

"Let us help you. You're strong, a good thing in this world, but needing help isn't a sign of weakness," Tali told her, sounding a thousand years old.

"Tali, I..." Ziva started, but she couldn't finish. Fumbling in her pocket, she found it. "Hold onto this," Ziva commanded, folding the necklace between her sisters fingers. "Grab it when you feel yourself slipping," she instructed her sister, she could hear the yells of the paramedics, but her sister was already fading away, going to somewhere Ziva couldn't follow her.

She heard her sisters breath hitch in her throat, her sudden struggle for air. Ziva couldn't bear the sound, the one _decent _person in her family was not going to die in such an awful way!

"Tali! TALI!" she screamed, catching the paramedics attention. She felt her sisters body move up and down, the blood undoubtedly overflowing her lungs. She felt Tali's back arch as she gasped for breath, her eyes clouding over. She saw her sister cough, droplets of blood spraying everywhere. Such a terrible, undeserved end to her beautiful sisters life, the girl who wanted nothing but peace in this world. Suddenly, stillness.

"Tali," Ziva said softly, the paramedics climbing over the wreckage, dragging a bag and stretcher with them. "Tali?" she said a little louder. Nothing. "Tali!" she screamed. She couldn't have just watched her sister die, she couldn't have! One of the paramedics ditched the stretcher and ran over, barely slipping on the wreckage like Ziva had.

Still nothing.

"Ma'am step back," the paramedic asked, gently moving her aside, checking her sisters vitals.

"You're too late," she mumbled, staring at her sisters unseeing eyes. One of them finally brought the stretcher, the one with the stethoscope shook his head. He wrote something down and moved on to the next man, completely forgetting about Ziva. She slowly moved over to Tali, and cradled her in her arms. She felt a tear cut a clear trail through the dirt that must be all over her face. She held her sister close, her scalp touching Ziva's chin.

"_Zichro livracha_, _akhoti haktana,_" Ziva whispered to her sister.

* * *

They'd checked for anyone in critical condition. So far ten dead, including Tali. They moved around and came back to Tali, to collect her body. Before they placed her sister in that awful black bag, Ziva squeezed her sisters hand. The stretcher jostled as she was placed inside, and Ziva winced for her sweet sister. They led her off the scene of the crime, but Ziva had seen the remains of the Palestinian boy who had detonated the bomb, she'd seen many like it in her line of work and didn't need anyone to tell her what happened.

* * *

**I hope you liked it! Please review!  
**


	2. Promise Me

**A wild second chapter has appeared! :O And I'm neither Jewish or Israeli, so I'm really sorry if my whiteness butchered anything!**

* * *

Faces and names she had already forgotten had driven her here, a few days after they conducted Tali's autopsy.

"Tali, you should not have been the one, it should be me. I should have spotted him sooner," Ziva whispered to her sister. She was having to sit Shiva while her mother flew in from Berlin and Abba cleared a great many things from his schedule.

_Of course, _Ziva thought bitterly, _he cannot abandon anything without clearing it with the PM, even his own dead daughter. _What a _mamzer _her father was. Ima would be in town before he would. And he was what, an hour away? Ima was flying straight in from Berlin to Ben-Gurion! And Abba probably couldn't leave the _koonefa _that caused her parents divorce. So here she was, all alone, staring at the casket that held her sister.

"Oh Tatelah," Ziva said softly, staring at the grains in the wood, looking for shapes like Tali would. She wanted to speak to her sister one last time, give her one last goodbye. She knew no one would disturb her, not while she was sitting Shiva, and she slowly unlocked one of the clamps, then stopped. Her mother had given her specific instructions to give Tali a proper Jewish funeral, as Ima was a very observant Jew. Ziva had told them no formaldehyde, or anything of that nature. That meant she was about to look at her sisters decomposing body- _No, _Ziva thought, _don't think of her that way. You don't want this __to be your last memory of her. _Ziva paused, then unlocked the other one. Slowly, in case she cowered out, she opened the casket. She saw her sisters remains, and nearly shut it, but disobeyed her instincts.

Her sister had been made presentable to go up to heaven, dressed in a _tachrichim_ and her face looked as though she was asleep, but Ziva knew better. She looked at her sisters face one last time, and said what she could.

"Tali, I should have warned you, stopped you until I realized what was wrong. But I didn't, and this is all my fault," Ziva began, her voice picking up in speed and depth as she carried on. "I will try to not isolate myself, really Tali, I will try," Ziva promised, meaning it with all her heart. Michael had called earlier today to see how she was doing, she had put on her brave face, but he called her on it. She had one week off to sit Shiva, so did Ima and Eli. She doubted Eli would take the whole week off, but she could count on Ima staying at her and Tali's home, where Ziva could find comfort. She was about to shut the casket, when a glint of light on the adjacent table caught her attention.

She looked at the bag the mortician had set on the table next to the casket, it was Tali's personal effects, she hadn't been able to go through them yet. It was the Star of David necklace she had given her sister, to keep her on this earth. Ziva looked at it, lying on top of her sisters wallet. A knock sounded on the door and Ziva snapped the casket shut, doing so silently, and called out.

"Who is it?"

"Eli, I am Tali's father," she heard her fathers gruff voice through the wooden doors. She scowled and used all her self-control to not include a select variety of words in her next sentence.

"Come back in ten minutes," she said, lowering her voice to be unrecognized, and she heard the sounds of a man shuffling off. _Doesn't even argue to try and see his own daughter, _Ziva thought icily, then opened the casket once again. She squeezed her sisters hand one last time.

"Tali, _zi__chra livracha_," Ziva said with finality, then closed the casket. Slowly, she walked over to the bag that contained Tali's personal effects and opened it, taking out the necklace.

It would be a reminder of her promise to Tali, the way it had been a reminder to Tali to stay on this earth. She put the bag back in it's original position, knocked on the door to let the guard know she was finished, and then went out into the hall.

"Eli, you may come in now," she called down the hall, then slipped out a side exit to go unnoticed by him.

* * *

Ziva arrived at Tali and Ima's house ten minutes later, beating the traffic by walking. She opened the door and saw her mother sitting on the floor, looking out the window onto the traffic below. Eli must have called to let her know he would be with Tali, otherwise she would be there herself.

"Ziva," Ima said softly, a sad smile on her face. Ziva's face puckered as her tear ducts overflowed, the grief now overcoming her where she could show her true emotions, clutching the Star of David necklace, remembering the promise she made to Tali.

"Why was it her?" Ziva asked, her voice cracking in the middle of the sentence. Ima shook her head, as if to say she didn't know, and folded a crying Ziva in her arms. She knew it was no use telling her everything would be alright, nothing would be the same after this.

* * *

The day of the funeral, Ziva and her mother were heading out to the car when one came speeding into the parking lot, the typical driving style of either someone without a care in the world, or an Israeli avoiding roadside ambushes. Ziva helped her mother into their car as the speeding one pulled up next to them, Ziva recognized the driver immediately. Michael Rivkin.

"Michael, you are supposed to be in Tel Aviv," Ziva hissed, no one at Mossad was going to see her and her family in this state, not even Michael.

"Ziva, I know that, but I thought you might want this," he said, holding out a file with the Mossad seal on it.

"What is this?" she demanded, but keeping her voice down as to not worry her mother.

"Files on the man in charge of the attack," Michael explained, "I can leave this in the apartment if you don't want your mother to see it," he offered and Ziva nodded. He jogged over to the stairwell, making sure the file was back in his jacket.

"Who was that?" Ima asked as Ziva hopped in the drivers seat.

"Just a friend," Ziva said vaguely, starting the engine.

* * *

When they arrived at the synagogue, Ziva saw one person she never expected. Ari. He was supposed to be undercover in Hamas, what was he doing here? Helping Ima into her seat before running over, Ziva scanned the place for Eli. So far no sign. Ziva wouldn't be surprised if the _mamzer _didn't show up. But this was Tali, and everyone adored her.

"Ari, what are you doing here?" Ziva whispered, family members and friends were giving Ima their condolences, they only had a certain amount of time before the other mourners worked their way over here.

"I'm in Ramallah buying weapons alright?" Ari said firmly and Ziva nodded. Eli did not know he was here.

"Ari, did you hear anything about this?" Ziva asked, soon the grief on his face was enough to tell her he hadn't.

"No, Ziva," he said softly, his eyes downcast, "I did not hear anything." She fell silent, unsure of what else to say. They both knew what a good person Tali was, better than the two of them combined. Ari had also lost his mother in an Israeli retaliatory airstrike, and now his sister in a Palestinian suicide bombing. Ziva couldn't even imagine how he began feeling.

"Ari," she said softly, putting her hand on his shoulder. "_Any__ mitzar_," as if it would somehow make him feel better.

"I should be. I should have heard something. And, Ziva, you were there," Ari said with such empathy, Ziva couldn't compose herself anymore. She fell into his arms and started sobbing, Ari joining her. When their tears finally stopped, the rabbi called for everyone gather. Ari slipped to the back, while Ziva headed to the very front of the pews. Rivka and Eli, who normally sat with an awkward space between them, seemed to be one. The casket holding Tali was placed where all caskets were placed in a synagogue, and Ziva teared up, but stopped herself.

The rabbi called out, "_Baruch atah Hashem Eloheinu melech haolam, dayan ha'emet,_" and they tore their collars in near perfect unison. Risking a glance back at Ari with Eli so close, she saw his collar was torn too, touching her deeper than anyone else ever could. Since Ari's mother was Muslim, Rivka hadn't felt it would be right to force him to be Jewish, so she let him decide when he was thirteen. He chose to be raised both, unlike her daughters, who she made sure had a good foundation in Judaism. After a while, Ari had drifted from both faiths, only studying Islam when it would be crucial to his cover. So when he tore his collar, Ziva nearly cried again. The pallbearers lifted the casket and carried it out, the Davids following suit.

* * *

It was a bit of a drive to Jerusalem, and Ziva followed the pallbearers to the burial plot. She placed a handful of dirt inside the hold, looking at how the dark brown specks clashed with the light pine wood. She stepped aside to let Rivka put her handful in, then Eli. Everyone proceeded, even the Mossad bodyguards. Ziva recognized one of them, trying to pass himself off as a bodyguard, but being a microsecond behind everyone. She had run into him in the parking lot of her mothers apartment complex. As soon as the service ended and the mourners left, Ziva pulled him behind a mausoleum.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Ziva growled, her hair catching in the wind blowing in east from Jerusalem.

"Making sure you are alright," Michael said defensively.

"You have no right to see us like this," Ziva snapped, but Michael kept his composure.

"I grew up with Tali too," he said softly. Ziva nodded and stepped back, remembering running into Michael in a Beer Shevan movie theater after he had moved up north.

"I'm so sorry Michael," Ziva said truthfully, and he nodded.

"What do you say we get some Ben-Gurion rice?" Michael asked and Ziva laughed. Whenever Ziva tried to convince Tali to ditch school she tempted her with the same treat.

"Sure," Ziva said happily, Rivka and Eli were deep in conversation, so they took Michaels car.


End file.
